MMB Chapter 1415 - 44: Frustration (Part 4)
Chapter 1415 - 44: Frustration (Part 4)
Their own Captain really is good in every way, except that when it comes to feelings she’s just too pure, too much of a blank sheet of paper... and way too stubborn and prone to getting stuck in a dead end.So back when she met Fisher in Saint Nali, the crew were worried she’d be tricked by some bad man, so she wouldn’t end up losing her money, losing her feelings, and gaining a few more hats on her head.
Well then, talk about words becoming prophecy—our Captain has practically been conned silly by that man.
By the standards of the Female Country, since she’s already "eaten" a piece of Fisher’s meat, you can’t really say she’s lost out, but Alagina takes feelings seriously. For her, such things were never about profit or loss in the first place; they were proof of their relationship...
And now she’s downright bewitched by that Nali man. The mistress is already sitting on her face, and she’s still thinking about his side of things. What if a little fourth, fifth, and sixth pop out later...
My heavens above, what on earth are we supposed to do!?
"Alagina, I’m begging you to wake up a little, okay? I..."
Pahetz glanced back at the open door, then walked over to shut it and lock it. Only then did she turn back and continue,
"I’m serious—if it weren’t for that Fisher, we wouldn’t be in this mess at all. We were living it up on the sea; life wasn’t exactly comfortable, but at least it was better than now, wasn’t it? He brought Isabella aboard, and she’s the apple of Elizabeth’s eye, a scalding hot potato he just tossed to us. And him? He swans around all over the world while we’re chased all over the map by Nali. Now we even have to come to the Wutong Tree and swallow this crap. I swear, I could just—"
Alagina only lifted her head to look at Pahetz, then said softly,
"What about Old Jack? If Fisher hadn’t brought him aboard, you wouldn’t have met the person worth entrusting your life to, right?"
Pahetz’s mouth opened, her expression suddenly stalled, and her words started to stutter,
"That..."
"Pahetz, you should understand better than I do that once you draw the bow, there’s no taking the arrow back. If someone really has to regret it, really has to feel guilty, then that should be on me. Blame me for recklessly killing that woman back then—my Mother—and taking you all far from our homeland; blame me for getting to know Fisher and leaving Isabella on the ship, making Nali hunt us, making our Allies betray us..."
"...Captain, what happened back then wasn’t your fault."
"Maybe that’s true, but Pahetz... people have feelings. I feel that way about you all, about Isabella who has now become one of us, and about Fisher as well. If it weren’t for you, I might never have had the courage to rebel against that woman and escape my tragic fate; if it weren’t for Fisher, I wouldn’t have had a goal worth rushing towards, you wouldn’t have met Old Jack, and we wouldn’t have a reliable companion like Isabella..."
"I’m just worried... Alagina, you’re full of feeling for him, but he might be selfish enough not to give you even the tiniest bit of feeling in return. It’s practically a gamble—using the happiness of the rest of your life as your stake. That’s what worries me."
"Then let me gamble, just this once. I’m already at the table, aren’t I?"
"...Oh my heavens above, I... I don’t even know what to say anymore."
Pahetz let out a sigh, then stood up and paced around the room with her hands behind her back several times before finally speaking in resigned frustration,
"Fine, fine, just don’t let me catch that man. If I ever catch him, I’ll..."
"Mm. Go get some rest, Pahetz..."
Pahetz cast a glance at Alagina, who sat on the bed without saying another word, then let out another heavy sigh, unlocked the door, pushed it open, and walked out.
"Creak..."
The door slowly swung shut, leaving the silence of the room to Alagina. Her face remained expressionless. After a short pause, she reached her bandaged hand into her plain robe and took out a folded paper airplane.
On it were written the words: "My Queen."
"..."
She stayed silent, saying nothing at all. Only after staring at that paper airplane for a long, long time did she slowly tuck it back into her bosom.
Then, as if she truly had nothing else to do, she finally dragged her now somewhat heavy body and slowly stood up.
Maybe she really isn’t strong enough, not good enough. Rather than looking for Fisher, looking for answers about fate, honest Alagina would rather place all the questions on herself.
But even if she knows she’s not strong enough, knows she’s a head shorter than Queen Elizabeth, than Renie, than Valentina—so what?
Can she build up her own power? Can she become stronger than Nali, who is now in her prime, stronger than the Frost Snow Phoenix Tree where they’re hiding now? But she’s all alone; aside from a group of trustworthy, life-or-death sisters, she has nothing else.
Then can she raise her own Rank and ability? But Rank is fixed at birth. Even with Troll mixed blood, even if she can surpass most ordinary people, when facing Phoenixes and Trolls, what is she supposed to do?
In these four and a half years, except for the frantic running for her life toward the end, before that she never stopped trying, not for a moment.
She built her own base and forces in the Pirate Harbor, found all sorts of relics and precious items, yet all those efforts were burned to ashes in the Black Chief’s betrayal.
She has no background, and relying only on her own effort, she still can’t achieve anything at all?